In March 2018 whilst Little Lady Luscious was working on Burlesque Idol an email popped into the idol applications inbox about four days before a heat.  It was the week of the beast from the east.  The application was from Lolly Jones a new burlesque performer with a Theresa May themed act.

“I feel that we’ve amalgamated into one being now.  What will I do when she’s out of office?!”

It began “I know the March heat is on Friday but if you have a spare slot I would love to do it.”  Initial thought was not bloody likely.  Then the beast from the east took hold and the South of England went into meltdown.  Then emails from performers began flooding in “My train has been cancelled”  “I’m snowed in”.  LLL being a northerner was in disbelief.  Those on the reserve list for that month now had plans or were also snowed in.  The day before the show LLL found herself emailing Lolly Jones, “This week is you’re lucky week, can you still do the show?”  Lolly leapt at the chance and went on to win the heat!  Theresa May doing burlesque was a hit!

theresa May in stockings and suspenders

Now that Theresa May (the beast from Eastbourne) is leaving office we put it to the Luscious fans and with a 91% landslide, Lolly Jones/Theresa May will be making her leaving speech at Luscious Cabaret on Friday.  To get you all warmed up and ready for this landmark of a speech read on to find out how Theresa May and Lolly Jones became one …

When you have a day off, what do you do for fun?

Currently, I’m learning how to ride a hoverboard for my next act – Angela Merkel.  She’s so boring that I’m keeping her on the move.   Other than that, I really like going on long country walks and drinking Prosecco with a view.  It’s a welcome change to writing an Edinburgh show.  If I’m in reach of wifi, I’ll just be reading up on Brexit.

How did you choose your stage name?

My stage name chose me!  My real name is Lorna and around fifteen years ago, someone misheard me.  They thought I said Lolly and it stuck.  But mostly I’m just introduced as Theresa May.  I feel that we’ve amalgamated into one being now.  What will I do when she’s out of office?!

What’s the craziest moment you’ve experienced as a performer?

I once did a show in Switzerland where all the electrics blew.  We didn’t have a techy so we just carried on in the dark.  The show was a three person Jekyll and Hyde. They didn’t miss out on much.

What do you love most about the cabaret community?

I’d previously been a stand up for about 6 years so when I crossed over onto the cabaret scene, I couldn’t believe the difference.  Rather than competition and self-deprecation, I’ve been immersed in a fun, supportive, exhilarating world.  I love seeing the props emerge from suitcases and learning how people came up with their bat shit crazy acts!  I love the camaraderie and the unpredictability.  It’s bloody wonderful!

Are you excited to see this love affair come to a close?  Book your seats to London’s most welcoming cabaret!

 

Opening up the application link on the luscious website meant opening up to new and very different styles of performance.  Little Lady Luscious loves it when something drops into the inbox that she has never seen before.  Luscious had never seen anything like Shirley the Middle aged siren and before she even realised she had done it the booked button was clicked.  Welcome another misfit to the Luscious mix who’ll have you giggling into you gin this Friday at Luscious Cabaret.  To give you a wee insight meet Shirley and what she loves about the cabaret …

When you have a day off, what do you do for fun?

Drink tea, eat grapes and swim

How did you choose your stage name?

Shirley came from an ‘S’ name to go with Siren and I was going for a derogatory term that used to be used in Australia for women, but got it wrong – should have been ‘Shelia’ and a cross with the Johnny Cash – a boy named Sue (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Gbtm-93oqE) – shows you a bit of how my head works, not terrible well?!

What’s the craziest moment you’ve experienced as a performer?

Too many to name, but most recent was when I was hired to be ‘Cat in the Hat’ for a school open day, but I was being driven by someone who is dyslexic and I’m dyslexic and we weren’t given the full address of where we needed to be, so we didn’t notice the difference between Lingfield and Lindfield – who knew there were 2 such closely named places?!

What do you love most about the cabaret community?

You guys are like my broken beautiful self

Are you ready to dive in and book your tickets to London’s most welcoming cabaret right here

The fate of Brexit maybe in the balance but here at Luscious HQ we are more concerned about leaving the worries of the world behind and having a fun and fabulous night out on the first Friday of the month.  We’ve gone overboard with the fabulous, added a soupçon of comedy and with Paulus away we’ve got the outrageous Carmen Mon Oxide at the helm.  Friday nights are all about the fun so come and join the Friday fun times at Luscious Cabaret on 5th April.  Entertaining you we have …

Ruffling a few feathers it’s the vivacious and flirtatious Trash Valentine!

Bendy to the extreme Miss Suzy Saucepot will leave you hot under the collar.

On the look out for an affluent sugar daddy is the delightful Ms Larissa Thorne

Praying for this Brexit nightmare to end is the multilingual extravaganza Diva Regina

Showing off her marvellous set of lungs is the fabulous  Lacey Noire

The fierce warrior that is Bolly Ditz Dolly will be shimmying her way to the Luscious Stage

Is it She-Ra or is it Ginger spice?  No it’s the rib – tickling Holly Dunn Something

Sending us in to a tailspin is the  very regal Zee Zee Stardust.

Back by popular demand and to show off her new skills its the inimitable Kiki Mellék

Yes we have packed the line up this month!  Tickets are already 50% sold.  If you’re ready to dive in and have an awesome, fun filled, ridiculous and fabulous night out book your tickets via the button below …

It’s May The Fourth!!! And that can only mean one thing.  Luscious Cabaret is ready to play at The Albany!  We can’t wait to entertain you all tonight.  And today we meet our final performer the awesome Diane Spencer!!!

1. Lets get straight to it, Star Wars or Star Trek?  Star Trek – sorry!  But it was the thing I always watched when I got home from school!  Plus I found that the first three films of Star Wars didn’t have many characters I could really relate to, whereas Star Trek the Next Generation had Beverly Crusher – lady doctor and redhead.
 
2. What was your inspiration for your may the fourth routine?  I’m a standup comedian by trade and I take inspiration from real life.  Life is always changing and happening, and if you’re half paying attention you’ll have an emotional reaction to it, and that’s where I start.  What I’m doing is essentially my usual set, however I’ve modified it slightly in keeping with this exciting and special event.  Other than that, it’s a secret… 🙂
3. Do you believe in alien life?  Yes of course, the universe is huge, and even if we are the only sentient ones, which I very much doubt, there’s at least going to be some moss or sea creatures out there.
4.Your fav star wars character and why?  Tricky.  Hans Solo cos he’s funny and good looking, but then again I really like that new Jedi Rey, she seems to have her head screwed on correctly.  Any character that shows a flicker of a sense of humour always wins with me.  
5.What do you enjoy about themed cabaret/burlesque nights?  The costumes!  I love the fact that the experience becomes immersive.
6. Fav star wars film  I guess, Return of the Jedi was great, but The Force Awakens was very very good too, but then considering what happens to one of my favourite characters, maybe not so much.
7. Talk us through your costume, did you make it, buy it? if you made it how easy was it/what were the challenges? What inspired you to use this costume.  This is a secret, you will have to come to the night.  Though I will say I attend comic cons and the stormtrooper and wookie outfits I see there are absolutely stunning.
 
8.Would you have crawled in your dead tauntauns belly?  Ew, no. Neither did Luke!  He was pushed.
9. If you could perform at another themed night, what would you like it to be?  Fifth Element – love the costumes!  Or perhaps a zombie themed night, like Resident Evil.
To find out what Diane will be wearing tonight come to The Albany.  Online tickets available until 4:30pm or you can buy tickets on the door.

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