In March 2018 whilst Little Lady Luscious was working on Burlesque Idol an email popped into the idol applications inbox about four days before a heat.  It was the week of the beast from the east.  The application was from Lolly Jones a new burlesque performer with a Theresa May themed act.

“I feel that we’ve amalgamated into one being now.  What will I do when she’s out of office?!”

It began “I know the March heat is on Friday but if you have a spare slot I would love to do it.”  Initial thought was not bloody likely.  Then the beast from the east took hold and the South of England went into meltdown.  Then emails from performers began flooding in “My train has been cancelled”  “I’m snowed in”.  LLL being a northerner was in disbelief.  Those on the reserve list for that month now had plans or were also snowed in.  The day before the show LLL found herself emailing Lolly Jones, “This week is you’re lucky week, can you still do the show?”  Lolly leapt at the chance and went on to win the heat!  Theresa May doing burlesque was a hit!

theresa May in stockings and suspenders

Now that Theresa May (the beast from Eastbourne) is leaving office we put it to the Luscious fans and with a 91% landslide, Lolly Jones/Theresa May will be making her leaving speech at Luscious Cabaret on Friday.  To get you all warmed up and ready for this landmark of a speech read on to find out how Theresa May and Lolly Jones became one …

When you have a day off, what do you do for fun?

Currently, I’m learning how to ride a hoverboard for my next act – Angela Merkel.  She’s so boring that I’m keeping her on the move.   Other than that, I really like going on long country walks and drinking Prosecco with a view.  It’s a welcome change to writing an Edinburgh show.  If I’m in reach of wifi, I’ll just be reading up on Brexit.

How did you choose your stage name?

My stage name chose me!  My real name is Lorna and around fifteen years ago, someone misheard me.  They thought I said Lolly and it stuck.  But mostly I’m just introduced as Theresa May.  I feel that we’ve amalgamated into one being now.  What will I do when she’s out of office?!

What’s the craziest moment you’ve experienced as a performer?

I once did a show in Switzerland where all the electrics blew.  We didn’t have a techy so we just carried on in the dark.  The show was a three person Jekyll and Hyde. They didn’t miss out on much.

What do you love most about the cabaret community?

I’d previously been a stand up for about 6 years so when I crossed over onto the cabaret scene, I couldn’t believe the difference.  Rather than competition and self-deprecation, I’ve been immersed in a fun, supportive, exhilarating world.  I love seeing the props emerge from suitcases and learning how people came up with their bat shit crazy acts!  I love the camaraderie and the unpredictability.  It’s bloody wonderful!

Are you excited to see this love affair come to a close?  Book your seats to London’s most welcoming cabaret!

 

Opening up the application link on the luscious website meant opening up to new and very different styles of performance.  Little Lady Luscious loves it when something drops into the inbox that she has never seen before.  Luscious had never seen anything like Shirley the Middle aged siren and before she even realised she had done it the booked button was clicked.  Welcome another misfit to the Luscious mix who’ll have you giggling into you gin this Friday at Luscious Cabaret.  To give you a wee insight meet Shirley and what she loves about the cabaret …

When you have a day off, what do you do for fun?

Drink tea, eat grapes and swim

How did you choose your stage name?

Shirley came from an ‘S’ name to go with Siren and I was going for a derogatory term that used to be used in Australia for women, but got it wrong – should have been ‘Shelia’ and a cross with the Johnny Cash – a boy named Sue (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Gbtm-93oqE) – shows you a bit of how my head works, not terrible well?!

What’s the craziest moment you’ve experienced as a performer?

Too many to name, but most recent was when I was hired to be ‘Cat in the Hat’ for a school open day, but I was being driven by someone who is dyslexic and I’m dyslexic and we weren’t given the full address of where we needed to be, so we didn’t notice the difference between Lingfield and Lindfield – who knew there were 2 such closely named places?!

What do you love most about the cabaret community?

You guys are like my broken beautiful self

Are you ready to dive in and book your tickets to London’s most welcoming cabaret right here

We are just a little too excited about Lynn Ruth Miller coming along to Luscious Cabaret.  An email landed in our inbox with the subject title “HELLO! Regina suggested I write to you”  with a recommendation from Diva Regina we knew this would be a special artist so we clicked read.  Lynn’s burlesque bio had us won over from the start:

“LYNN RUTH MILLER started doing burlesque on stage when she was 73 years old. She won the best newcomer and most original performance at the Texas International Burlesque Festival in 2012, headlined at the Bristol Burlesque Festival in 2015 and has been ripping her clothes off at every opportunity ever since. She is a regular at Whip-it-out Productions in Bridgewater and in the London Burlesque productions and will be starring in the Glasgow Burlesque Festival in November 2018. Now 85, she insists she can still shake, rattle and roll with the best of them.”

Lynn Ruth Miller with pink feather boa wrapped around her

This is what we love about burlesque here at Luscious Cabaret.  There truly are no boundaries, you can be a glamourous showgirl in one act and a science fiction character in another.  You can choose classic music to strip to or you can choose heavy metal.  And in Lynn Ruth Miller’s case you can be 85 and shaking that ass with the best of them!

We couldn’t wait to learn a little bit more about her for our blog.  If you’re inspired and want come on down on Friday to meet this wonderful human being the ticket link is at the end of the blog.

When you have a day off, what do you do for fun?

I paint pictures.  It is my secret calling.

How did you choose your stage name?

My mother chose it.

What’s the craziest moment you’ve experienced as a performer?

There have been so many; I think my favourite one  so far is when a gorgeous young man in his twenties told me how sexy I am ( I told him to make an appointment immediately with an Ophthalmologist)

What do you love most about the cabaret community?

I love that there is no sense of competition  We all are there to help and encourage one another.

On that note why not come on down on Friday night and show your support of live cabaret.  Encourage our artists with whoops, cheers and maybe a tipple or two …

https://www.designmynight.com/london/pubs/fitzrovia/the-albany/luscious-cabaret-june?t=tickets

The May bank holiday is coming up and what better way to celebrate than booking a ticket or two to Luscious Cabaret!  There will be fun in abundance, plenty of friendly faces, fabulous food and booze all under the roof of the marvellous Albany Great Portland Street.  Leave your worries behind and let London’s most welcoming cabaret embrace you in a hug of glitter and giggles.

Carrying you away this month is …

May line Up.png

Agent Chlamydia Jones and their secret mission.

Pupin De Vert with a bit of pride and prejudice 

The Sensational songstress Ember  

Sensual and coy Rose Demure

Taking us on a ride is Juliet Peaches 

Out of this world Phoxy Qurvy 

Electra Valentine with her intricate web

Loris and Lee will be getting us giggling

The boss Little Lady Luscious will be getting up on stage

And if that isn’t enough Paulus will be back and drinking all of the wine!

Get ready to feel the love with us and book your tickets …

 

The fate of Brexit maybe in the balance but here at Luscious HQ we are more concerned about leaving the worries of the world behind and having a fun and fabulous night out on the first Friday of the month.  We’ve gone overboard with the fabulous, added a soupçon of comedy and with Paulus away we’ve got the outrageous Carmen Mon Oxide at the helm.  Friday nights are all about the fun so come and join the Friday fun times at Luscious Cabaret on 5th April.  Entertaining you we have …

Ruffling a few feathers it’s the vivacious and flirtatious Trash Valentine!

Bendy to the extreme Miss Suzy Saucepot will leave you hot under the collar.

On the look out for an affluent sugar daddy is the delightful Ms Larissa Thorne

Praying for this Brexit nightmare to end is the multilingual extravaganza Diva Regina

Showing off her marvellous set of lungs is the fabulous  Lacey Noire

The fierce warrior that is Bolly Ditz Dolly will be shimmying her way to the Luscious Stage

Is it She-Ra or is it Ginger spice?  No it’s the rib – tickling Holly Dunn Something

Sending us in to a tailspin is the  very regal Zee Zee Stardust.

Back by popular demand and to show off her new skills its the inimitable Kiki Mellék

Yes we have packed the line up this month!  Tickets are already 50% sold.  If you’re ready to dive in and have an awesome, fun filled, ridiculous and fabulous night out book your tickets via the button below …

We’re Getting excited for Luscious Cabaret – it’s less than one week to go! So with that in mind we learn a little bit more about this month’s luscious performers.

We’ve asked them where – or for whom – they would most like to perform one day? Here’s what they said…

The ultimate drag star – Dolly Trolley

“If we dare to dream, the pyramid stage at Glastonbury would be my pick…with 30 backing dancers in shopping trolleys. I’ve loved going to festivals since I was a teenager and enormous stages with tons of productions and sprawling crowds make me go weak at the knees. And if I could pick Lady Gaga and Tom Daley to be in the audience too, then they would be the juiciest cherries on top of the cake.”
The boss herself – Little Lady Luscious
I think the obvious answer is ballet dancing Darth Vader at the Royal Albert Hall.  The tiniest Darth Vader in that epic venue would be amazing!
 
Character Comedian – Gemma Layton
“I would most like to perform either with the League of Gentlemen or in front of Rick Astley (the latter purely as a way to dazzle him and seduce him).”
Burlesque Beauty – Ruby Panther
“I’d really like to go back to the strange little hotel I first saw a burlesque competition in, to bring things full circle and maybe even inspire someone else to get involved in this wonderful world.”
 
The gorgeous – Purrsia Kitt
Picture: Carl Manners
“I would love to perform somewhere on Broadway someday if the right opportunity came along.”
And our new Compere beyond Compare Paulus!
Picture: James Millar

“As many of you know, Bette Midler is my spirit animal, so I’d like to perform one day in a bath-house/sauna just like she did when she was first starting out. I would like said bath-house to be populated entirely by the cast of Orange Is The New Black wearing nothing but white fluffy towels. Tunnocks tea cakes will be served at half time.”

Join us at Luscious Cabaret at the Albany at Great Portland Street on Friday 7th September. Tickets are available here

This month Stormina has been wandering around Nude – Yes that’s right; her full foof and everything at Hooray Cabaret’s 6th Birthday show at Bethnal Green Working Men’s Club. Everyone who follows this blog, and I know everyone does, knows that Stormina loves a themed show and always enjoys a Hooray.

For this show, in aid of Cancer Research, they choose to celebrate their birthday in their birthday suits with almost all acts (Dave the Bear you let us down…) appearing fully nude and audience encouraged to do the same.

Hooray always has a really appealing mixture of comedy, cabaret and games. This month there was a mixture of five comedians, all fully nude and burlesque, fire and boylesque. Highlights included, Glory Pearl opened with a stunning striptease, despite being fully nude from the very beginning, A comedian performing a full routine of characters and impressions; entirely in the nude and Onyx Fatale (Twix) who was running the tech for the show, breaking out of the booth at the end to strip off and dance to Rihanna’s cake.

All is held together, nominally, by Victoria Kember, a co-producer of the show, who after getting the audience to strip her during a game of pass the parcel at the very top of the show, stayed naked throughout and demanded the full attention of the audience for her vagina for the rest of the night. She was funny, charming and outrageous and made the chaos that is a Hooray Cabaret seem normal and even necessary.

 

Stage Manager’s mention

This month’s Hooray was a really challenging one for the Stage Manager, Sirene Fox, with a ketchup covered stage first up after the interval. She was excellent at her job and all she had to put up with in the ensuing mayhem…

Also, full points for wearing bows all over her bum in a makeshift bustle. Yes.

 

Stormina’s top 3 moments

3.“I know it” The angriest thespian I have ever seen, when the audience started to join in on his rendition of To Be or Not To Be.

2.Glory Pearl getting stuck in her corset during her burlesque act. Handled with such poise, like one of the greats of our industry.

Food or Body Part – the best game of the night. Where a victim from the audience was pulled onto the stage, blindfolded and had either pieces of food or body parts placed into their hands to guess whether it was food or body part. Stitches.

 

With only a week to go until the next instalment of Luscious Cabaret we are ready to kick off our performer interviews with the awesome Miss Glory Pearl.  At the tender age of seventeen, Miss Glory Pearl absconded from her exclusive, Alpine finishing school and, in a fit of pique, joined the circus. She honed her aerial skills in the big top, drawing gasps of delight from village children across Europe.  We can’t wait for the good times to begin!

 

Tell us a bit about why you decided to start performing. 
Initially it was to supplement my income as I took a 40% payout when I did a career change! Not very romantic, but true!
How do you come up with a new act or routine? Give us some insight to your creative process.
With burlesque, it usually comes from listening to music and having an idea of doing something ridiculous to a track. I tend to hear the jokes, if that makes sense – how the music and costume or action could combine to generate a laugh. With character comedy, I have an idea for a character, then come up with a name for them, once I have their name, the costume, voice, posture etc all come really easily. And for stand up, I usually start with what ever is bugging me and try to see the stupidity in it. My comedy is largely observational so that means paying attention to the world in general and having an opinion. I find both these things easy.
What’s your next challenge in life or in performing?
At present I’m looking at touring to build my audience, writing my next stand-up show, and I’ve just started writing comedy poetry so I’d like to perform that more. 
What’s your favourite thing about cabaret?
The absence of the fourth wall – it means every performance is an act of co-creation with the audience.
Where – or for whom – would you most like to perform one day?
I think I’d make a good fist of hosting the Oscars – couldn’t be worse than James Corden, after all.
Tell us how you’d spend an ideal day off.
At home with the furry fam, peace and quiet, good food, lots of sleep and maybe a bit of telly if I’m feeling adventurous. Life is busy. Peace is a luxury.
Current TV guilty pleasure?
Definitely Strictly. Although Tess Daly can do one.
Any memorable audience members that you’ve encountered throughout your career?
Loads – it is the chief pleasure of live performance. But the people who come up to me after a gig and say the show has helped them or made them feel better about themselves are an especial pleasure.
 
Without giving too much away, what can we expect from your act? 
Tits and muff.

We can’t wait to be back at The Albany Great Portland Street on Friday 2nd March.  To see what Miss Glory Pearl has in store for you book your tickets via the button below.
https://partners.designmynight.com/pw?v=3&r=6862367
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We’ve had a lovely summer break, but we’re so glad that we’ll be back in October with a Luscious Lineup of Lovelies to entertain you. We’ve got a fantastic mix of Luscious favourites and brand new faces you’ve yet to meet, so we’ll get right down to it!

Making us laugh, cry and gasp in awe and amazement, the ever delightful Paulus.

Photo credit: James Millar

Show Girl Extraordinaire and Queen of the dance floor, Gracie Disgrace.

Photo credits: Photo Storm

The beautiful voice and face of Bambi Bang Bang.

Photo credits: Baden Clare

The Amazing and Fantastic Coco Nobel.

Photo credits: Veronica Verve

 

The truly Magical, Sissi Emerald.

Photo credits: Stephan Burn Photography

Fresh from Edinburgh, the incomparable Dolly Trolley.

Photo credits: Momographs.com

And naturally, no show would be complete without our very own Michael Twaits lighting up the night!

Photo credits: Stephan Burn

Luscious Cabaret returns on Friday, October 6th at the Albany – you can book your tickets here.