So this month we’re looking back at a Luscious family show starring my very own self; Stormina Teacup and other members of the Luscious family.
Our story begins one cold and nippy evening last winter when Little Lady Luscious had the idea for a collaborative show with Gentleman’s Relish (a boylesque four-piece of former Luscious students) and a group of her former female students. We put on our first, sold out show in July and then we were back on 1st december with a winter warmer of Christmas Cabaret.
The show itself was a ridiculous mixture of Christmassy acts, with burlesque from the delectable Bootsy Bonafonte who took us on a magically naughty sleigh ride; the charming Dickie Dalliance who took us down under for a saucy Santa strip and the remarkable Vince Moon who scandalised the whole audience with his deviant Santa act. The lucky audience were serenaded by adorably obscene Igor Maniac and the Tempestuous Stormina Teacup. They were treated to fire by the Blazing Sandy Fishnets and a sneak preview of the Queen’s speech with HRH The Duke of Edinburgh, the regal Chalkilicious. There were also collaborations from everybody’s favourite boyband who gave us their own form of festive sass and a delectably cheeky finale number starring the whole cast and choreographed by our very own superstar; Bootsy Bonafonte. Holding the whole show together was our stunning host: Onyx Fatale. Hilarious, gorgeous and always an absolute gift. She gave us exactly what we wanted for Christmas. (This all alludes to stuff she did on the night; namely bursting out of a giant box and dancing to Maria Carey).
Stage Manager mention:
I love a good stage manager and Gigi Moonshine was so good at her job that our photographer didn’t even manage to get a picture of her. Fabulous work!
Stormina’s Favourite bits:
3. The amazing barista in Bootsy Bonafonte’s Sleigh Ride act. Bootsy is always a stunner and that act is EVERYTHING – but the Barista. The Barista was fire. (Played by Stormina Teacup)
2. Sexy Santa in the finale number “Man with the Bag” – was undoubtedly the most convincing and definitely didn’t make any mistakes in the choreography. We’ll never know who played “sexy Santa” except that we do – it was me, lovers – Stormina Teacup!
1. Stormina Teacup’s amazing performance of Louis Armstrong’s ‘Zat you Santa Claus? With a voice like Caramel and a beautiful sheer couture gown, made by her very own fair hands; Stormina gave an amazing performance of an outrageously attractive woman who really wants to meet Santa Clause but is afraid that it may actually be a monster coming to get her. Her performance was an absolute tour de force. Amazing.
OK, OK, you may have noticed a discrepancy in our normal impartiality here. Little Lady Luscious has very stringent standards for her blog and takes bias very seriously. As a result I’ve asked our lovely and very Luscious photographer, Stephan Burn for his Top 3 moments of The Great Christmas Spread;
3. Now we’re off to a bad start with number 3 but I swear this is legit; Stephan’s third favourite moment of the show was Stormina Teacup’s “’Zat You Santa Claus?”
For context – Stephan is always at every Luscious event and has been witness to all of our graduations and early performances. Stephan said (I promise) that it was really good to see such a confident performance from someone who is normally more than a little bit timid (who me?). This is all Stephan’s own opinion and has nothing to do with the suitcase of cash I gave him before the show.
2. Everyone loves a transitional moment – Stephan’s second favourite moment of the night was one such. He’s chosen the glorious Vince Moon’s transition from Doris Day’s Here comes Santa Claus to something altogether more sinister and bestial. I don’t want to ruin the reveal too much – but let’s just say that Santa has a little more in his sack than you were possibly anticipating. For the record – Stormina was not involved in this performance at all. She wasn’t even one of the hot babes who came on with feather fans at the end. Hot babes were played by Bootsy Bonafonte and Sandy Fishnets.
1. Stephan’s favourite moment of the night was another transition. Gentleman’s Relish’s change from 4 Wise Men from the East to 4 men from East 17. Who doesn’t love a boyband act? And the boys gave an amazingly authentic performance of this classic thugs need love too track. I won’t tell you about what they did with their socks because I think you should go and see this act next Christmas and I don’t want to spoil it for you.